Sunday, October 21, 2012

A Good Night's Sleep is Essential for the Upholding of Constitution


Among other messages that I have kept in my ‘sent items’ in my cell phone, (in spite of 95% memory full), like my address, my email id, my blog url that I need to share with people now and then, there is one message of a peculiar nature that I also keep.
“Could you please talk softly and lower your TV volume? I am unable to sleep”.

This message I send on alternate days (worst case) or twice a week (best case) between 1 AM and 3 AM in the night to these bachelors who live on the floor above me.

Before these guys arrived, there was another group of bachelors living there and I never had this problem with them. Only once, the very first time, I was disturbed in the night by their Television volume. I went to them and told them so. After that day, they never gave me a chance to complain.
But of course, they were South Indian bachelors. And that means a lot.

The guys occupying the place now are North Indian bachelors. UP, Bihar, I don’t know what...
The first time, I told one of the guys that I could hear them. He said ‘ok, we will be careful’.
The second time, the guy says, ‘we don’t have TV, we watch movies on a laptop and since there are many of us, we can’t use headphones. We have to use speaker phones.”
“Could you keep the volume low? Or close your windows please? I can’t sleep”, say I.
“Ok yaar we will try”

The third time, I talk to the guy, he is annoyed, “We do it in our house right, not in yours? If you can’t sleep, what can we do?”
I am amazed.
“You do it in your house, but its falling into my ears”, I am pleading this time.
‘Ok, ok....’

The fourth time, I don’t talk to the guy personally, because its 1:30 in the night and I am in my bed; I message them stating that I can hear their loud voices.
And I receive a response. “You are too much yaar...You have a problem with our talking also...this is too much really ok’

Really? I am too much! Indeed!

And then, the next day, I heard their talk, laughter... arre yaar, ye yaar....woh yaar... tub hi saala.... and then some woman inside laptop yelling at the villain... I found myself messaging again. This time, I did not delete the sent message. I thought I might need it again. And I was not mistaken at all.

What a plight! I have no boyfriend, no husband to engage in messaging activity with, so late in the night but I need to message a bunch a boors so that I may get some sleep.

Sometimes the laughing and talking continue even after my messaging. They have probably decided to defy me. These days I go to bed with a pair of earplugs by my side. When it becomes too much, I insert them. They are uncomfortable, but then...

At times, when I am just about to drift to sleep, I wake up with a start, doze again, start again, doze again, start again...and then reach for the mobile phone and message, if that doesn’t help, reach for the ear plugs.

Have these guys never lived in a decent neighbourhood before and haven’t their parents brought them up with the learning one should not cause disturbance to one’s neighbours in any way – talking loudly, singing, TV watching, dancing?

What sort of guys are these? North Indians: UP, Bihar, Delhi, Haryana, Punjab... half of them...if not all of them...(I have had many Hindi speaking friends in my circle, who are really decent)

But also...

If you see a waiter in a restaurant being bullied, you can be 80 percent sure the bully is a North Indian.
If you see a guy brazenly flirting with a woman at work who was just introduced to him minutes ago, you can be 80 percent sure he is a North Indian.
The less said about aggression on road, rash driving, honking, the better.

And in Maharashtra, when people have a problem with boors from UP and Bihar, what do people say? Constitutional rights? To go wherever they want? Do whatever they please? And make a nuisance of themselves?
Useless preachers. The ones who have to put up with these uncultured guys know. Anyone can preach.
May be some politician is using the issue to create a vote bank. Do what you need to stop him.
But are these immigrants blameless?

Why should I, for instance, care to uphold the constitutional rights of these inconsiderate guys living above me who don’t let me sleep peacefully, day after day?

What is to be achieved by harping about constitutional rights? Everything remains as before. Does anything change?
Instead of harping about constitution, why can’t states like UP and Bihar take heed of the cries of polite-people-invaded-by-boors and educate their lot, imbibe some culture in them, teach them some basic manners, include what is needed in the school/college curriculum to make their rustics a little more civilized, before letting them loose on cultured societies like us who are too polite most of the time to even show our displeasure and simply go through silent suffering?
Seriously. These states and their people should know by now, what others think of them and try to be a little less disgusting.

Judge me not. The above does not define my general approach towards outsiders to the state. This is in fact a Hindi-loving, North-India-touring, salwar-wearing, Punjabi-Gujarati-Marwadi-food-relishing, any-day-preferring-Bhangra-to-Tappanguchi, devoted-to-old-Hindi-film-songs woman, lashing out at her persecutors in a sleep deprived state of mind.
The Kannada people are the most tolerant, accommodative people in all of India. Yes, they are. They are the only South Indian people who understand as well as speak Hindi reasonably well – better than south Indians from all the other states.

But until these outside guys stop behaving like cattle, learn some public sense, until they stop shouting into their mobile phones, until they learn the code of conduct for living in a neighbourhood, I would wish someone would chase them all out of my state.

Meanwhile, constitution can go fuck itself.

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