Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Error of Judgment

People we like most in life often prove to be an error of judgment.
If this is true for me alone, then it’s my luck.

But if you agree with me, even some of you, then it’s a pattern that calls for deep reflection.

Actually, there is no error of judgment, because there is no judgment to begin with.
Many a time, we don’t love people because of who they are. We choose to love them first and then attribute qualities to them that would make them worthy of our loving.

There is very little judgment and lots of imagination. We imagine he must be this, she must be like that. After some time of believing, this imagination becomes reality. More imagination builds upon it. We snatch fragments and fractions of reality to verify our preconceptions. Once verified, more imagination grows on these preconceptions.

And then comes a jolt of reality like a quake and everything tumbles down. And we lament. In confusion - most of the time not sure whether it is the person who disappointed us that we are lamenting or our own judgment.

Whichever way, it does hurt a lot. When someone we have put on a pedestal falls down.


Pallavi Shahi said...

I love this post. Its so to the point. For mere mortals like us generally keep lamenting over the luck factor and never really try to perceive it logically. Which is the only way how the pain/hurt/confusion can be minimised and a rational though can be brought out from the entire wreckage caused. Cheers!!!

Nitish Ratnam said...

Ah, don't know the unfortunate soul behind this post! Just 3 posts this month, are we falling behind on our throughput lately?

Sowmya said...

Thanks Pallavi and Nitish :)

Yeah Nitish... only three posts ... though I have so much to write about... Need to do something about it...

Ujjwal said...

Very thoughtprovoking except for one line which I find a bit uneasy to accept "We choose to love them first and then attribute qualities to them that would make them worthy of our loving."

Do individuals choose to love or is there is some deep psychic force that brings them nearer to each other. A kind of bridge. And then our imaginations in a way decorate that bridge, try to strengthen it, make it look the way we want it to look etc, till suddenly the other person decides to move a little distant.

Its sad but may be if the 'decoration' is done by both the beings, can it be expected to last the travails of life.

Coincidentally your previous post is about Lord Krishna. In Gita He denounces three attributes of mind to be shunned - Fear, Anger and the third which you have referred in this post- Attachment.

saloni said...

this blog post strengthens the fact that we and only we are responsible for whatever happens in our life.

Though many people would have thought in the same manner as you did...but i doubt if all of them can express that so beautifully

:) thanks for giving us words !!

Anonymous said...

"Aao hum sab pehenle aaine,
Saare dekhenge apna hi chehera,
Sab ko saare haseen lagenge yahan,
Hai nahin jo dikhayi deta hai,
Aaine par chapaa hua chehera,
Tarjuma aaine ka theek nahin."

Anonymous said...

If this is true,we should hate a person or thing by instict and attribute reasons later..Not sure I would agree
It could be some emotional trigger which decides if one should be loved or otherwise.Even this could be due to series of sub conscious records in mind over life.
BTW what if love or bliss is "natural being"